I don reach season 5 of this Fuji House of Commotion and I’ve been slowly compiling a list of things I must see happen before the series ends:
Joffrey, dead and gone. Check.
Theon, off my damn screen.
Lady Brienne of Tarth, wed to a Dothraki stag of her own. Where she proceeds live her the rest of her days in peace and armory. It’d be so cute, her constantly lecturing her husband on why he should wear armor and him, constantly telling her how no matter how much armoir he wears, she’ll always be his biggest weakness. Her, going mush in the knees and wet in the…
I digress.
I can’t lie, so far? So good. I’m of the sincere opinion that Daenerys is a fraud sha, but her track records so far might also have an opinion on my sanity.
I love Arya. She reminds me of my 8 year old baby sister, whom I dubbed Tarzan because of her insatiable need for adventure. Right now, Yiv is in her Arie faze, complete with a fade and fighting boys. I love Arya. Solid babe for real.
If Lord Baelish followed us to do Hogwarts Week ehn, not only would he be a Slytherin - he’d be the damn basilisk Salazar was hiding in the bathroom (omg, a snake in the bathroom?! Faculty of Law stopppp, leave me aloneeee). He hella cute tho, and I’d take my vows as a man of the Nights Watch for that accent, chile! Phew!
Eddard Stark gives honorable people a bad name. Had to be said. Ah! Please, if you want to be a good person, don’t leave your sense at home o! Carry it with you like MTN o! Omo.
Aani se ore to ma gbe wa ku. Ni oruko Jesu! Amin! Amin!! Amin o!!! Oluwadarijimi fr mehn.
I saw a meme comparing Jamie Lannister to Prince Charming in Shrek and now I don’t have an opinion of him that doesn’t involve a donkey. You’re finished if you understood that joke. Absolutely, comically finished.
Anyway, anyway! Sign ups for the week have begun and 8/9 houses already have chief representatives for their houses. If you’re yet to be sorted into a house, all you need to do is fill in the bingo sent in after this post and send your results to Ken.
Easy peasy.
Tomorrow, the houses will go head to head a good, old fashioned game of Mafia. If you’ve never played, this is a fantastic time to do exactly that. Be sure to sign up and show up for your house tomorrow!
In other news, Final Year Week is around the corner! Scheduled to begin on the 2nd of June through to the 8th.
We open with Corporate Day and I cannot think of a better set of people to EAT this up. I’m talking about witnessing the MET GALA of corporate days, call the gaddem CFDA - they definitely want to see this.
And in case you haven’t picked out what to wear, don’t worry! Don’t stress it! Take each day as it comes and download Pinterest. No, this is not an ad but it is a great step in the direction of an Exceptional Fashion Week. Here are a few more if you’re not the most fashion inclined person in the world:
Beware of colors, patterns and textures: The very material you put on your skin can make or break your outfit. If you’re buying something ready - made, be sure you try it on under natural lighting so you an determine the color tone of your outfit on your skin. Watch out for how you combine and distribute your colors too. Be careful about mixing patterns - polka dots, florals and/or stripes - but don’t be boring about it. If you’re having something custom made, be sure your tailor has seen you recently so they can put together something for the you NOW, not the you that was 6months ago.
Your fit has to fit: My guy, if you do not plan for your trousers to stop at your ankles - they have no business stopping at your ankles. Your outfit has to fit like a glove! Pay attention to your sleeves, your bust/chest area, your waistline and the length of your trousers. Nothing should be slipping or falling off anywhere unless you intend for it to do so. Double check everything everywhere.
No hair & makeup is allowed: The men have survived thus far, I promise that you will too. Search your feelings, you know you don’t need to wear that much makeup. You know that you’re beautiful just the way you are. The most important thing is that you’re comfortable in your own skin and that your mama is proud.
A little lip balm wont hurt: my dudes! Start to take care of your skin! Moisturize! Exfoliate! Cleanse! Pamper thine self, o son of Adam - you deserve to glow this incoming week. You deserve. Fashion starts from YOU. From your body and then we can add in the clothes and the whatnots. Look sweet for me, baby boy. Make I see you to toast.
Expensive doesn’t always mean better, but it does guarantees better a lot more than cheap: close your eyes, put your hand on your chest and repeat these words solemnly “it’s money. It is made and it is spent. It comes and it goes. I will spend money, I will make money. Money comes to me but it finds no rest in my hands. I spend a lot of money, but I make a lot more”. This final year? You go spend. You fit no spend pass the next person but you go do wetin? You go spend. Plan your finances around yourself, be ready to give yourself many treats. Buy those shoes that you want, that watch, those cufflinks, that bag. Buy it.
Pay your final year dues in the matchless name of Jesus! *blows powder* *does sign of the cross*
Come 17th, we’ll be earning our first set of gold medals.
Exceptionals, are you ready to make history?